I am at a point here where I have no idea what to do with myself. I spent 15 years or more building websites and learning various coding languages, but my design skills are sub-par, to say the least. And design isn't something easily learned by just anyone; artisticness plays a significant role in design.
I am not artistic in any way, shape or form. It's an unfortunate truth I have had to come to over the years. And while my programming is pretty good, in my opinion, no amount of sufficient programming means anything ultimately when the presentation is, well, what you see here.
Now, if I actually had some goal in mind, some kind of content to focus on that would in of itself be it's own appeal, I could work with that. There are a ton of sites out there where the appearance is pretty lackluster, but the content is so appealing that any poor design is meaningless next to the content. IMDb.com is a perfect example of this; that sites design is, well, poor in my personal opinion. But it does well enough for itself due to it's content.
Sadly, I do not have any kind of 'content' to focus on at the moment, which leaves me at a loss for what to do in terms of coding. For a time I thought I would utilize what I've done so far and tweak the programming side as needed, primarily writing 'blogs' since I had that feature in place. But after writing a few here and there (with massive leaps in time in between), I realized that a writer I am not.
Honestly, I hate writing.
Even writing this is a chore. It's painful, boring, and because my laptop is utter garbage this is excruciatingly frustrating; among all the problems with this laptop, the worst is the mouse touchpad. For some reason, the touchpad will freak out in a way that makes the cursor unresponsive, and for some reason all open windows will minimize and maximize at random until I connect an external mouse and simply move it once. After that, the touchpad (and cursor) will return to normal.
I have a ton of topics I'd love to discuss, but I absolutely hate writing. And because of that, as well as everything else I have said here, I am at an absolute loss for what the hell to do with any of my sites, or a lot of my free time. I hate the thought of just throwing away all of that time I've spent honing my coding skills, but if I have nothing to work towards, what's the point?
I paid for a full year of hosting, so I probably have about 8 months or so left before I have to worry about anything. However, it's never too early to plan. Unfortunately, that 'plan' may end up as a final exist plan; canceling my hosting and letting my domains expire.
There really is no purpose to this posting ultimately. I'm just putting my thoughts into writing, in an attempt to force myself to do something. If anyone reading this has any advice, or input, I'm all ears (or eyes I guess). Until then, thank you for reading.